Sexy and I Know It

Several years ago there was some sort of trend on Facebook for a brief day or two. It consisted of your friends picking out the sexiest picture of you from the photos you had on your page. I could be completely wrong about what it actually entailed, but I do remember that a good friend of mine commented on a picture of me skydiving. She said that it was my sexiest picture. It was an interesting thought…what makes a person sexy? Clearly, to her, ┬áit was my daring, full of adventure side that was captured in one brief moment as I was free falling toward earth. Of course, it wasn’t sexy about five minutes after that photo when I got sick to my stomach after the parachute opened and I threw up all over my flight suit on the way down. But that’s a story for a different day…

Two days ago, while going after my greatest running achievement so far, I was reminded of that picture that my friend had declared sexy. It was such a warm, sunny afternoon this past Monday, that I decided to go running, even though I had gone the day before. This was Week 5, Day 3 of the Couch to 5K program and it involved 20 minutes of straight jogging. No walking interval inbetween. Man, I was nervous! Could I do it? I was pretty sure I couldn’t, but I was giving it all I had. Because the sun was beginning to set as I ran, I was able to see my shadow. My heart sank a bit when I saw it. I know I’m still overweight, but here I could almost look back at myself and see this person who is overweight….attempting to run. I felt foolish. But only for a moment because I immediately thought of my “sexy” skydiving picture and I knew right then that this shadow, this picture of me running, that’s sexy. I may not have been the picture of perfect fitness, after all, it took years for me to get this large, I’m not going to shrink all that much in two months, which is unbelievably how long I have been working at this. But right then, I knew that I was giving it my all and when the music dimmed in my earbuds and the voice of the digital coach came on to say that it was time to cool down, I couldn’t have been more proud of myself. I had gone the full 20 minutes without stopping to walk once! Any neighborhood observer would have caught a glimpse of my arms and fists raised in a brief instance of Rocky Balboa style victory.

While I didn’t take a picture in that moment, sort of a memento of my personal accomplishment, I did post about it on Facebook. The outpouring of love and support I received from friends and family made me feel beyond good. My knees the day after though? They hurt as bad as they did when I sprained them during that now infamous skydiving adventure. But again, a story for a different day…

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